I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
Randomize
