She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
Randomize
