Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
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