all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
Randomize
