babies were throwing up all over the place
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
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