You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
then he tried to convert me to islam
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
Randomize
