I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
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