You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
I think i got beer on your cat.
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
Randomize
