Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
Randomize
