I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
50% drunk capacity currently
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
