I kiss like a newly born barfing kangaroo
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Randomize
