would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
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