We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
He told everyone he was freezing their keys so they couldn't drive drunk. When I opened the freezer this morning, my keys were at the bottom of an unfrozen ice cream tub of vodka.
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize
