Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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