Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
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