I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize
