Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
Randomize
