so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
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