all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
I just chugged whiskey at 7 AM because going to breakfasts at Brendas doesnt seem right if Im not real drunk. I feel like when Brenda takes my order she can tell Im drunk and will take care of me.
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
Randomize
