his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize