I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
After so many times of carrying your puked covered clothes home in a bag on a Tuesday morning, you begin to realize that Fucked Up Mondays aren't a real thing.
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
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