I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
Met Dan at the park for lunch and the guy parked next to us was getting a BJ the entire time. Way to make me feel like an inadequate girlfriend, random park skank. All Dan got was a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea...
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
You're breaking my sexual little heart
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
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