Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
Randomize
