Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
Randomize
