yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
Randomize
