More tranny stories later!
she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
Randomize
