i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
Last night i stole a disco ball from a frat house by pretending i was pregnant.
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
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