loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
My favorite part of the day is the 2 seconds of ignorance you have when you first wake up. Right before you remember where your mouth was last night.
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
I want you to know I am at work super hungover and I threw up in the mop sink. I feel like you will appreciate this
You're my fucking hero
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
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