the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
I drank a fishbowl of liquor and next thing I know I'm sliding into Zach Galifinakis' DMs
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
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