So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
So apparently the bar gave out free condoms, which I now have a pocket full of. Why is drunk me shoving the fact that I'm single and not getting laid in sober me's face...
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
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