I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
Randomize
