My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
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