Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize
