I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
pray to the hookup gods
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
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