this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
I'm driving in the middle of nowhere, and I just saw a stuffed Barney hanging from a noose on a tree. Maybe I should turn around.
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize