I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
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