Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
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