I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
Drunk walkin through police station. America
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
Randomize
