I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
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