Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
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