Cab driver just said he likes mutual masturbation in the cab. Um
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
i've created a new STD.
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
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