please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
just dd'd my mom home while she begged me to let her drunk dial my ex, jammed out to party in the usa, and then passed the fuck out. thanks for the genes mom.
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
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