I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
New rule: gentleman callers are required to bring me gifts of beer when coming over to court you. Tell the monster jam dudes so they know.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
Randomize
