omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
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