Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Randomize