that's an acceptable place to lick
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
Randomize
