somebody snuck up and got me drunk
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
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