Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
Randomize
