This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
i dont even know how to be here
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
Randomize
