people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
So I woke up with a terribly bandaged finger an then discovered a pot of bloody onions on the stove.....who the fuck decided it was a good idea for me to try and cook
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
Randomize
