All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
At the ER, will you come pick me up... Had an allergic reaction, wanted to see if I could eat a peanut without dying... Do you how bad this is evolutionary, I would have died back in the days of survival of the fitest by now
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
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